Compromising or giving up?

They say that marriage is about compromise but when does the compromising begin? Does it start when you have your first fight as husband and wife? Or once you've passed the honeymoon phase? Or does it start right from the wedding? Growng up, I've been led to believe that the wedding was all about the bride. It was about bringing the bride's fairy tale dreams to real life and everyone indulging her lavish wishes. But ever since I've begun this planning process, I feel like the wedding I'm working to build is nothing like the one I envisioned. To appease my parents, I gave up my idea of an intimate wedding, To accomodate the large number of guests, I gave up my beach reception. To follow the guidelines of the church, I gave up the song I wanted to walk down the aisle to. To stay within the budget, I gave up my dress. Sometimes I can fool myself to think that this is for the better but then there are times when I don't even know whose wedding I'm planning.

Mo' Money Mo' Problems

Ever since I started planning the wedding, its the only thing thats constantly reigning my mind. When I go out to eat, I check out the resturaunt's decor and think of ways I can apply it to my reception. When I'm shopping, I think of gifts my bridesmaids would appreciate. Even when I'm dancing at the club, my mind is keeping track of the playlist and wondering if the DJ has any experience at weddings. With all these good ideas filtering through my head, my wedding has become more and more elaborate which only equates to more and more spending. And after poring through magazines that promote the "necessity" of chandeliers and parasols and searching for photographers in the low thousands, my take on value of a dollar has become askew. Suddenly, a couple hundred dollars on flip flops so my friends can dance the night away in comfort doesn't sound unreasonable. Five hundred on candles and tulle - chump change. Its only when I forget about the wedding completely than I'm able to regain a normal person spender status. In the midst of $5000 luxurious silk gowns and invitations hand addressed by a professional calligrapher, how do you keep your head leveled and budget under control?